You know that feeling when the sun breaks through the clouds, creating what can only be described as Heaven rays? Well, that's the perfect description of Miss B's entrance into the room. For our first meeting, the consultation, she burst through the door with a grin and jazzy personality that filled the room immediately. Her laugh, her amazing smile, and her....aura were all so incredibly infectious that I knew she NEEDED this. With an energy that powerful, one can feel it shift and when she began to tell me her story....a story of loss, heartache, and disappointment in this beautiful body of hers, the clouds came back together and tears rolled down her cheeks. The day of her session was a day filled with such an array of energy feels: anxious, fear, excitement, joy, nervousness...it was a cocktail of all the feelings...and the day started with more clouds, than sunlight. But she persevered, as the sun tends to do on the cloudiest of days. Suddenly, the beams were back, the grin spreading from cheek to cheek, the sass coming forth in every movement, and the goddess within bubbled forward, basking the entire studio in what can only be akin to the sun breaking over the horizon in the morning, casting it's glow on everything it touches. Miss B came alive right before my lens. I feel incredibly privileged to have gotten to know and experience Miss B and I can only imagine how grateful those who know her feel, when she casts her warmth and sunlight on them. Miss B wrote her own beautiful recount of her experience, in life and in her session because she knew it might be able to inspire just even ONE woman to feel differently....to feel empowered. Without further adieu, here she is:
I have always been a confident person, even when I had no right to be (hello 90’s? - Eek!). I’m not sure why but think it has to do with two things; I was the tallest, thickest girl in most of my classes growing up, so I accepted who I was early on and made no apologies for it. I was also lucky enough to have been raised by an incredible Mum and fabulous aunties who’d repeatedly tell me, “You can’t change the width of your shoulders or the size of your feet/You are beautiful inside and out - don’t be afraid to show the world who you are/Be fashionable, learn what flatters your body and walk tall/Size doesn’t determine worth.” This permission to be myself allowed me to flourish, to be kind, outgoing, intelligent, compassionate and confident.
On February 14, 2013 all of that changed. My husband and I were told that due to physician’s errors we’d never be able to have children. Utter devastation doesn’t even scratch the surface of how it affected us – me most of all. I am an only child and my husband is the only son with a partner. I placed the burden of carrying on both family lines directly on my shoulders and I felt I had failed myself, womankind, my husband, our parents and every antecedent that had ever lived. If I wasn’t going to be a Mum, what purpose did my life have? How could I face our families knowing I was such a disappointment? What did I have to live for? Through it all, my amazing husband would remind me, “I didn’t want to marry you so you would bear my children. I wanted to marry you because I knew I had to spend the rest of my life with you!” Coming from a very British upbringing where lips don’t quiver and you Carry On, I did my best to show a brave face to the rest of the world. We immediately started the process of adoption, went about our daily lives and fell apart in the privacy of our home.
Six months later my father died. The man who loved me unconditionally from the moment I took my first breath until the moment he took his last, was gone. Neither of us could do wrong in each other’s eyes and my decimation was complete. I totally gave up on life, on caring about myself and on hope. I felt worthless. I was reduced to nothing. I wailed and wallowed and grieved these deep losses for a long time. Through it all, my husband loved me, adored me, and reminded me that life was worth living. He still saw that spark of ME hidden under layers of sorrow that I thought was gone forever. Michael literally kept me alive.
Every Valentine’s Day for the last five years has been a shit show. We re-live that awful day in the doctor’s office and it casts a very dark shadow on what should be a wonderful celebration. This year I vowed to take the day back and made an appointment to see Teri. I was sick and tired of this sadness owning us and from now on, thanks to Teri, this date will be a celebration of us and of what we’ve survived together.
As I sat there during my reveal and saw these incredible images of myself, I was overcome with emotion. Yes! This is ME! While I watched my slideshow, tears streamed down my face, and with every blink I could see that Teri captured the Me I had lost, the Me my husband fell in love with and the Me the world used to know. I was shocked at how gorgeous I looked and yet felt a great swell of pride and confirmation as the hidden Me returned. When I started this process with Teri, I had convinced myself that this was going to be a gift for my husband and stand as a testament of our strength and love for each other. What I didn’t expect was that I fell in love with Me again.
Whether or not I become a mother, my life has meaning and purpose; to love those in my circle; to share my artistic gifts and bring joy to others; to be a light for everyone I meet and remind them that they have value. I accept what has been, live for what is and look forward to what will be.
This glorious babe has SO much love to give the world and I am so pleased that she stuck around to share some of her light with me. She also gave me the nickname Taco-Mama which I fucking love and am in the process of making a tshirt! Miss B, without a doubt, you are one of the most effervescent, brilliant women I have come to know and meet and I know you are going to move on, warming everyone with your beautiful light.
If you are interested in having your own self-love experience and uncovering that hidden light within, shoot me a message and let's have a chat!
She Is Fire ~ Winnipeg Boudoir Photography
A few times a month I offer up casting calls as a way to practice shooting, lighting, and posing. Miss A came to the studio as part of a boudoir casting call and this babe did not disappoint. With her firey hair and an attitude to match she slayed her session. Take a look at her gorgeous session below:
A Little Wet, A Little..Feathery... {Vancouver Travel Diaries}
When I was in Vancouver, I had the excellent pleasure of photographing a plethora of Pacific coast babes, including plus model Ruby Roxx! Now, this babe has made some killer traction, being one of the first plus models to hit the scene back in the day. Now you will see her gorgeous body and face modeling for various lingerie companies and sharing her love of all things Disney! Not only was this bombshell a treat to shoot, but holy heck, she is one of the sweetest babes I have ever known...I mean, the fact that she shot with me while she was at the tail end of planning her wedding (so, now she's a Mrs.!) is incredibly! We got a little wet, a little wild, a little feathery, and had a good time! Check out some of the shots and make sure you give her a follow!! Lingerie from: Dear Scantilly, Lovechild Boudoir, and LACE Canada.
Her Life Was Never the Same ~ Winnipeg Boudoir Photography
You may recognize this babely babe from a previous shoot (as well as our sample album in the studio!). We invited Miss S back into the studio to help with our latest video because she is a perfect example of how a photoshoot can change your life and affect the way you see yourself in the world (that, and she is a stunner, so that's fun!) One thing Miss S taught myself (as well as the other boudy babes) is that you can use swimsuit bottoms as panties for your shoot!! They are usually higher waisted, can come in some awesome colors and patterns, and bit better than panties for curvy babes. What did I teach Miss S? Well, she might say things like how to take a selfie, or to love yourself, but really, I also taught her about the awesome clothing selection at Boohoo.com for us plus size chikkas (sorry for your bank account, Miss S.)
But seriously, while I may have inspired Miss S in regards to body positivity, ultimately it is her decision to choose love for herself every day. She speaks openly in our video about her affirmation cards and her journey to continually falling in love with herself. Here's what she has to say about her experience through boudoir:Teri is your own personal affirmation card, she builds you up , she shows you how to see yourself as others see you NOT how you see yourself through judgment .
In the entire process of your shoot from consultation to reveal she teaches you how to love yourself believe in your self and gives you the confidence to see and believe your beauty in whichever shape or size it comes in . Teri is a beautiful soul and everyone needs to have a Teri experience your life will never be the same , you will never see yourself the same way again.
You can check out Miss S' story and video below:
NEWSFLASH: WOMEN LIKE SEX ~ Winnipeg Boudoir Photography
Let me just put this out there: women are allowed to enjoy sex. {GASP!} But wait! There's more....women are allowed to like sex in any capacity that they like: vanilla, rough, BDSM, multiple partners, monogamy, ALL OF THESE THINGS AND MORE. And more importantly, just because a woman likes sex in any of these capacities it does not make her: a slut, frigid, boring, "asking for it", or any of the other bullshit things we are told when we ask for what we want/need. For me, boudoir photography is meant to empower women,whether it be confidence, sexuality, or otherwise. Below is one my favorite memes on the internet and I am sorry if you are offended by the C* word, but to be fair it is a feminist word to begin with (plus I lived in Scotland for awhile and the novelty of the word wore off).
I think it's really cool when a woman can claim her sexuality. I am not saying you need to share details about your sex life all up in the internets if you don't want to, but I don't think sex and sexuality is something that women should be ashamed of. We should be able to ask for what we want (just as we should be respected for saying No to what we DON'T want).
I wanted to do this super saucy darker session and Miss J obliged me in coming out to play! Have a peak at this steamy session below and if you ever want to incorporate some sauciness into your session, let me know! This is a safe space with no judgement for you explore what makes you excited!
