Last year I had put up a casting call looking for someone to let me use ice on them. Little did I know that this session would yield so much more than just the opportunity for me to do something out of the norm for me. Instead, Miss K and I talked about body image and she divulged her experience with eating disorders (she also participated in the Empowerment Project for that). During her session, I could see that Miss K had so much passion and the movement of an artist as I directed her and she made it her own. It was AFTER the shoot, however, that I realized just how much this gorgeous babe was struggling internally. While we had talked about body image, we never really talked about the source of it or the life experiences that led her to that place. When I realized that it was because someone tried to claim her body as his own, this shoot mean oh, so much more. On the surface, this shoot was a fun time, me learning new lighting, posing, and styling, but underneath all that, this was an opportunity for this babe to give herself permission to continue on her journey to healing, self love, living a passionate life, and reclaim the body that is HERS.Here is her story (TW: sexual abuse, eating disorders, etc.)
Please forgive me, as this may be a long and winding road to get to the end of it.
I have never felt comfortable in my own skin - and it was something that I was taught from an early age, between restrictive dress codes for schools and summer camps and the way the other girls would talk about themselves - and others - in the gym locker room. I dealt with (and still struggle with) disordered eating as a teen and young adult. It's been tricky, of course, it's difficult for everyone, but I was making progress on accepting the body I was in.
Then last year, on a warm jazz-fested evening, I was sexually assaulted by someone who I had counted as a close friend, an integral part of my personal and professional community. My progress stopped.
I won't walk you through the gory details, I relive them often enough. The situation was grey in a way that I knew would never be conducive to legal use and justice, so I buried it in my head as much as I could. I underwent the appropriate testing immediately and six weeks after the event, and was thankful to have escaped with as little extra baggage as I did. I started attending an Anglican church service on Sundays, and sometimes couldn't physically say the words, “forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us,” but that was okay. I was okay. It was over, I was okay.
I saw him again, about a month ago, at a social gathering to celebrate a friend's birthday. She didn't know, I hadn't told her. I hadn't wanted to break up the community, and so not very many people know it happened, much less who was culpable. I didn't know that he was going to be there, and it shook my sense of safety, my sense of okay. I barricaded myself in the washroom, texted my best friend, and cried. She told me that I could stay or go, that either was okay, that I needed to prioritize myself and my safety, and so I decided to stay - to consciously decide to put my own will first. I got lucky: he had left before I came out again, but that decision to prioritize myself lingered, and it was as a result of that that I put my hat into the ring when Teri offered a casting call for a model for a shoot.
I never used to feel completely comfortable in my own skin, but I'm making progress again. I recognize that my body is my own again. I'm learning to love it and to live in it again.
Give the Middle Finger to Fear ~ Winnipeg Boudoir Photographer
Every time I post an image or blog post of some bad ass boudy babe, I get comments or acknowledgements like "OMG, you are so brave" or "I would be so scared to do that" and while I am not denying that getting in front of a relative stranger is scary as shit, it is one of those empowering experiences that you look back on and say "I don't know why I was so worried" and "I am SO glad I did this!" So, while I can sit here and go on and on about why you shouldn't let fear hold you back from anything, most of all a boudoir session with moi, I will let my past boudy babes share THEIR fearless stories. {Remember, fearless isn't about the lack of fear, but rather doing something DESPITE the fear!}
"I would tell him/her to remember that there is fire inside him/her and to try and remember how bright it burned before it was stifled with doubt. Then pour some gasoline on that bitch and gitter done.""I tell my kids all the time that it's ok to be scared because it means you're going to do something really brave. Also, you have so much to gain from the experience!""Don't be hard on yourself. Being uncomfortable is part of the journey. It is necessary for you to feel what you are feeling, freely and without judgement from yourself first and foremost. Be trusting to those around you, and be vulnerable. Society teaches us to fit a mould and to nitpick at ourselves if we don't fit it to it's entirety. Your session allows you to break free from that, so embrace yourself for all that you are, and all that you are not. It's both rebellious and empowering to do so!""There is something so reassuring about the way Teri runs as session. I felt more at ease, more comfortable, more free with Teri just by the way she interacts with you. You know she's "a safe place", you know she "gets it", and you've seen how amazing Teri's work is..... The session is about you, how beautiful you are, and how truly transformative and empowering the session can be. Just be honest with Teri about how you feel, and she'll bring out the amazing woman in you that everyone else sees."
"Trust in teri but more importantly trust in yourself! She is the artist but remember you are the canvas, a work of art. I understand being nervous or scared but just let it all go. Close your eyes, breath out the crap and breath in the gold and let yourself transform!""Let loose and embrace yourself and your body. Bring that outfit that you feel amazing in and I guarantee your confidence will shine through. Don't think about what others will think about your photos. Just keep in mind this is a time to get dressed up and treat yourself! It's an amazing experience. You'll have the jitters at first I am sure. Just remember that your beautiful,sexy, smart and intelligent! A woman who is strong and powerful!""There is something amazing about being vulnerable and then realizing that the person you're with is only there to make you feel amazing. I didn't realize how much it means to have another woman tell you how beautiful you are until I was mostly naked with Teri Hahaha. It was so cool, and an experience I'm always anxious to share with others."
"Just do it!! Embrace being scared and nervous and trust in Teri! She knows what she is doing, and you will look amazing and feel so confident after the photoshoot! Trust the process and just put your trust in her and have fun!""That allowing yourself to be vulnerable is the birthplace of innovation, change and growth. It's the cornerstone of confidence and to quote Brene Brown, "we are wired to be brave; that's why we never feel more alive than when we're being courageous".""Best thing I ever did for myself! I was almost sick with nervousness even though I knew I was in good hands. The excitement from the reveal boosted my energy and lasted weeks! It's a great feeling to be excited about yourself for a change. Absolutely love my pictures.""You will rediscover yourself. The whole time I'm standing there talking to a woman I just met while wearing lingerie and all I could think was, why don't I feel weird right now? Like I could just drink a coffee and chat with Teri in my underwear like it was the most natural thing."
" I would tell that someone that sometimes you need to let yourself be vulnerable to someone else so that they can see all the beautiful incredible things you are for you to see them. You are strong enough, brave enough and fierce enough for this and soooo much more. Believe in yourself and the rest will fall into place. Best thing I ever did...forever grateful....""It's exciting and nerve-wracking which is perfectly normal , within minutes of Teri snapping pics you forget the nerves disappear your doing things in positions you've never would have thought striping your clothes off with ease to change outfits and then your done and you think that's it that wasn't so bad. And you will be nervous again once it's time to reveal Teri will give you the low down ..you will be 100%convinced you won't like 1 picture ...then they are on the screen , you will need to pick your jaw up off the floor and you will say Shit! Is that me that bitch on the screen is Fierce and beautiful and sexy and it's you and you will be wanting ALL the pictures .. and then you will be an hooked and will want to take pictures all the time !!!""Grab life by the lady balls and be fierce! Teri will be your spirit guide and you will feel so empowered!! 
❤️ no regrets.""And on those days in the trenches raising toddlers where I haven't showered or shaved or worn makeup for days, I just open my boudy book of photos to remind myself that I'm a god damn GODDESS!"
"1) It's okay to feel scared.2) It feels so great to be brave.3) Teri is magical and makes you feel so at ease it's crazy.4) You will feel empowered and like a total boss for a very long time after the shoot. (Possibly indefinitely)5) You only see the good photos.6) Again, Teri is magical. (Like a Teri Godmother or something)7) You get to look at your awesome babely photos of yourself later and be like "Holy shit, that's me, I'm a mu'fuckin' babe!"8) You are beautiful, and strong, and worth it, (and all the other good things) and you should go for it!9) Seriously, just go for it.10) Doooooo it.""You are worth it. Regardless of how much you love or hate your body features, Teri goes beyond the physical aspect. She gets ya in the feels. Inside you feel fierce. You come out seeing those physical features in a different way. The environment is safe and empowering. Teri truly invests her time in you. Shouldn't you do the same thing?"
While these are just a few of the stories to come out of the Boudy Babes, I promise you that every woman who experiences an empowerment boudoir experience emerges with renewed self confidence, a wee bit of pride, and an acknowledgment that she is one sexy, bad ass babe ready to take on the world. I hope the words from these babes will quell some of that fear that stops you from pushing the contact button or lets you procrastinate until "one day when..." So, when you are ready to give the middle finger to fear, I am here and I am ready to give you one of the most empowering experiences of your life!
She Could Be Very Judgmental {of herself} ~ Winnipeg boudoir photography
I have a feeling you will be seeing a lot of Miss H on the blog in the future! She was a blast to hang out with and also helped me out a few weeks after this shoot with another shoot for a tutorial that I am working on. Not only did Miss H kill her shoot, but she got WHY we do what we do here. This babe was a little bit of a chameleon on camera, changing her look for every pose and outfit I gave her. Turns out, she was a theater kid, so she loved being in front of the camera and giving me everything she had. I will let Miss H take it from here and talk about her experience being in front of my lens for the first time:
[It made] me feel confident in my own skin again, I haven't felt this beautiful in years (I truly mean this, Teri is an absolute inspiration with the way she empowers body image and cuts negative thoughts out of her shoots). The biggest thing that stood out with me was before the reveal, the way she spoke, and how she spoke about not looking at yourself with a judging eye. That truly stuck out to me, as someone who is always judgmental of myself, and I called my mom afterwards to boast about how great that was and how amazing the experience was!
From the first phone call, to consultation, to the shoot and to the reveal, Teri was absolutely phenomenal to work with. The way she portrays positive body image absolutely blew me away. Not once during my shoot did I feel self conscious, and that's all thanks to Teri. I would HIGHLY recommend every single person to do a shoot with Teri, because the way you feel so empowering, beautiful, and sexy throughout the shoot is worth more than money can buy. Even if money is tight, she has amazing payment plans.
Boudoir shoots can definitely feel very intimidating if you've never done one before. I had kind of done one before, but wasn't fully satisfied with my shoot. I came across Teri's page and thought I would give her a call. The shoot itself was absolutely life changing. If you're even considering doing a shoot- DO IT. You will feel so strong and sexy and that feeling is priceless. Teri's photo's speak for themselves, and the experience with her was great. I would really love to commemorate her though for her outlook on body positivity which is the sole reason I think every single individual should do at least one shoot with Teri. She is kind hearted, and totally empowering. I have never met someone as inspirational as Teri who believes so much that each and every single one of us is beautiful, and wants to show us through her way of photography. My entire experience I felt safe, sexy, and not a single self conscious thought crossed my mind. The experience is priceless, and worth every single penny.
Needless to say, I may have shed some tears when I heard back from Miss H about her experience. It is my wish with every session that I help the person in front of me to gain a little more confidence and put a little crack in their negative self-image. Slowly, we work to help chip away at those negative thoughts and doubts about ourselves that we have, erasing the judgements we cast upon ourselves when looking at images or previewing a video.
If you are ready to explore yourself and help knock back some of those negative voices, I invite you in just for a consultation to learn more about how we can help you "find yourself" again. You're in there, we just need to bring that bad ass babe out!
The Price of Doing a Boudoir Session ~ Winnipeg Boudoir Photographer
Boudoir is quickly becoming more and more popular among the masses and I couldn't be happier about this. You see, boudoir photography has been around for ages, but prior to about 5 years, it was very much focused on gifting photos of your body to your significant other. While I don't necessarily have a problem with this, I do have a problem with the fact that when women started to do it for themselves, they received a lot of push back, being told they were narcissistic, "should cover up", and other various phrases that make me a bit ragey. It drives me nuts, because it's okay for women to be oggled and seen as beautiful by someone else, but as soon as she sees that within herself it is too far? Wtf.
We also know that there are a rising number of boudy photogs all over the world with a variety of different prices, styles, experience etc. but at the end of the day, boudoir photography IS a luxury experience and therefore, a luxury investment and you want to make sure that you are getting everything you want out of your session. While the dollar cost is up to you, I want to talk about the REAL cost of boudoir photography from a client AND boudoir specialist viewpoint and set some expectations as to what will be expected of YOU as a client.
1. TimeI know it sounds silly, but you will need to be ready to invest in taking time for yourself, and as a sister to a mom with three babes, I know that it can be hard for women to make time for themselves. Sessions with us range from 3-5 hours and the reveal another 45 minutes to an hour, and in the grand scheme of things, you may not think that that is a lot of time, but try asking a mom with a toddler to take a 30 second pee break....it ain't happening. So, if you are wanting to do a boudoir session, be prepared to take time for yourself (I promise I won't interrupt your time by tugging on your shirt and telling you when I poop).
2. VulnerabilityThis is one of the hardest things for people to be and we ask for a lot of it during your sessions. We will ask you to tell us your why, get you to talk about your real feels about your body & view of yourself, and we will ask you to literally and figuratively bare yourself to us. In exchange, we will get vulnerable with you. We will tell you OUR struggles, experiences, and let you know that you are not alone. We will also ask you to sit in front of a big screen TV and watch intimate photos of yourself, which can be slightly scary, but we are there with you every step of the way. There are hundreds of women of all sizes, shapes, and backgrounds that come to us with their own stories and we absolutely love that, but the one thing they all have in common is that they are ready to get vulnerable with us.
3.TrustThis is another thing people have a hard time doing. Every time a woman sits down in her consultation, I can see the fear that I might not be able to deliver her expectations (thankfully, I'm a cocky fuck who accepts this challenge). It can be a hard thing trusting someone to help you see yourself the way you want to be seen, and I appreciate every woman that has given me the chance to photograph, chat with, and help them through understanding that while they are beautiful, their looks aren't the best thing about them. Trusting your photographer is probably one of the biggest "taxes" one has to pay when doing a boudoir session, but when you do, you reap the benefits big time!
4. ControlI find that about 50% of my clients are more than happy to let me take the reigns, but the other 50% are fearful about letting go and I find this sometimes relates back to #2 & #3 above. I always let my clients know that I would prefer you to give me everything you've got, because A) you will never see the "bad" photos and B) you are here to get in touch with yourself. Usually after about 20 minutes the 50% that like their control, will loosen up because I am dedicated to helping you get in touch with your bad ass self, but I promise the further you go with it, the more epic your images will be. Also, we are artists before anything else, so the more control you give us the more artistic and emotional your images will be...hold back and you will get duplicated images that have no real emotion behind it. Essentially: give it up, we know what we're doing.
5.NudityI know it sounds a little creepy that a tax you pay to doing a boudoir session is that you have to show your naughty bits, but honestly isn't that why you are here in the first place? Wanting to know what it feels like to get nudie, explore your body in a judgement free zone, and experience the freedom of being a sensual, bad ass woman? Now, not all photographers will ask you to go completely naked, but if you come see me, I will. So this is an expectation I set with all my boudy babes and why I do consultations beforehand. Here we believe that your body is the only vessel you will be provided in this lifetime and it has probably gotten you through a lot of shit, so it deserves some love and pampering too. Also, though it can be daunting, I personally find that most clients are more comfortable completely naked than they are with lingerie.
6.ChangeLastly, the acceptance of change is something that will be necessary when you do a session. What I mean by this, is that you must be ready to accept that you are a bad ass, fearless, confident, and babely woman and stop telling yourself the fucking lies that we all have been known to tell ourselves. If you aren't ready for the possibility of change, then a boudoir session probably isn't for you. We all know that change is scary and it's scary because it essentially is an accumulation of all the above. We always associate with "change" with a negative outcome, questioning our desires and answering with our worst fears. The "what ifs" take over and so we never move beyond our comfort zone...doing a boudoir session WILL require you to change (but I promise it will be one of THE MOST POSITIVE experiences of your life).
So, whether you decide to spend a lot or a little bit of dollars on your boudoir experience, I urge you to find a photographer that will be able to fulfill the other cost requirements: someone who is trustworthy, excited and passionate to help you move forward in your journey to celebrating your size & goddess-like nature, someone who will give you permission to take time for yourself, someone who will gently coax you outside your comfort zone (or push you, haha), and someone who is confident to take control when you are in such a vulnerable situation. It's important that lines of communication are open between you and your photographer and just like dating, not every client will be for every photographer and vice versa. Find someone who gets YOU. And if that person happens to be me, shoot me an email and we will be more than happy to set up a consultation!
2016 Wrap Up ~ Winnipeg Boudoir Photographer
Last day of 2016 and I am, not shockingly, hanging out in my studio writing this bad ass post. I procrastinated it a bit this year, but a lot of things changed in 2016, so should this tradition, I guess! Instead of recapping every single session that I did this year (there were WAAAAY too many to put into a blog post) I wanted to highlight the sessions and experiences that refocused me, challenged me, excited me and helped propel my business to where it is today! So, let's get going on this bad boy. (Just a reminder that if I DON'T mention your session here, it's not that it didn't mean anything to me, because every woman and client has their own stories that tear at my heart. These are just the ones that stand out the most in this moment!)1)The Session that affected me the most: She Fell In Love With Herself with Miss S.
This beauty's session affected me by showing me just how powerful a session (and my persistence) could be. Not one, but 2 consultations later this babe found herself showing off her glorious bits in my studio, but it was during her reveal that I remember just how much her session had impacted her. She was afraid to look at the images, fearful that she might hate what she saw, but instead she fell in love with herself all over again. Miss S reminded me of why I do what I do and who I do it for. From our first meeting where her arms were crossed to her reveal where she hugged me almost 5 times, we both were changed, realizing that she was capable of being so fucking sexy this whole time. Since then, she has done another session with us and is one of the most empowering, fearless, confident, strong women I know and I am extremely proud to call her my friend.2) The Boudy Babe responsible for inspiring me to do more: She Hated Her Photos with Miss S.
When I finished my shoot with this Miss S, I was creatively exhausted which is the sign of amazingness in a shoot. As I edited her images, I was blown away by how awesome she did. I was so excited to do her reveal. During her reveal she was quieter than most (which isn't completely uncommon), but her husby was there and he was fucking blown away by her gorgeousness. It wasn't until I got her shoot follow up questionnaire back that I found out the whole truth. She had hated what she saw in the photos...and while she stated it had nothing to do with the images, it had everything to do with the relationship she had with herself it still hurt my heart. Now, I am confident enough in my work to know this was one of my best shoots to date, but I realized that SOME clients (probably 3-5%) require more than just ONE photoshoot to help them see themselves as the bad ass babes that everyone else does. This was the shoot that was the driving force behind Body Image Bootcamp and our new Empowered Education site: iammorethanjustabody.com where we provide resources, education, talks, and a variety of other things for babes to work on healing their relationships with themselves. So, thank you to Miss S, for sharing her truth with me and an update, since getting her album Miss S has started to see what everyone else knew all along. By looking at herself a little bit every day until gifting the album to her husby at his birthday party, she saw her beauty.3)The shoot that pushed me creatively: When in Vegas with Miss A & Miss J
Oh man, Vegas was aaaaamazing. I love surrounding myself with like-minded people and it was during my time in Vegas, that I got to explore my Sassy-Ellen Von Unwerth-inspired-style of shooting! This shoot pushed me creatively because we were running out of light and I had to make due with what I had, but I also had to use my off camera flash (which I haven't really used except for weddings) which was new for me. We styled up this entire session and it was the first time I incorporated any types of sex toy props which was actually a lot of fun (and now I have a fancy collection of floggers, whips, handcuffs, etc.). After doing this session, I realized I needed to do fun stuff like this more often just to push the boundaries a little bit. Ps. I am heading back to Vegas in February if anyone wants to do a kick ass shoot!4) The shoot that exhausted me creatively: Get Outside with Miss J.
For this session, Jill and I headed out to our friend Tamara's gorgeous acreage to explore, do some sessions, and talk to her about some ideas we had. We literally spent the entire day shooting outside, exploring the fabulous variety and lush natural beauty of Tamara's place. We shot a number of different outfits and by the end of the day, both of us were extremely exhausted, but it reminded me of the importance of being inspired by a new environment and the utter joy that comes with looking for new ways of shooting on the spot. This entire day is one of the highlights of 2016.5) The session I finally did: Cherry with Miss J.
Since we are on the topic of Jill, I figured we would land on this one. I have had this idea in my head for at least 2 years and kept making excuses as to why I "couldn't" do it. Since 2016 was my year of "take a chance and just fucking do it", I finally made it happen. Jill and I scoped out the sketchiest motel we could find, grabbed the outfits, collaborated with Nicole & Kelly to make the style perfect.6) The client who made me see the other side: Too Much of This, Not Enough of That with Miss C.
Miss C came to me over a year ago, but working with her through 2016 I became more aware of eating disorders and how it can affect someone. She brought me the perspective of someone on the opposite end of the spectrum of myself, showcasing that regardless of someone's size they still can experience dissatisfaction with their bodies. I always knew this, but it's important to showcase it. You never know what someone is experiencing so before you pass judgement, say anything critical, maybe think twice and consider your own circumstances.7) The project that let me get something off my well endowed chest: An Open Letter to Addition-Elle
The fabulous babes that came out to help me showcase that the dolls who ACTUALLY wear Addition-Elle lingerie, looking fucking fierce so why are we being shown size 12-14 models, helped me tick this one off my photoshoot checklist! I felt better just meeting these ladies and talking about their feels about the marketing.8) All the traveling sessions!!
2016 took me a lot of places: Portland, Las Vegas, Calgary, Vancouver, Omaha, the Carribean, New York, Regina, Ottawa & Toronto to name a few. I am excited on expanding upon this list in 2017 as I travel, doing photoshoots, teaching workshops, attending workshops, and attending conferences and learning ALL the things!! Any place you think I should go?
So, darling lovelies! Thank you for sticking with me yet another year and supporting the work I do! My goals and desires for 2017 include:Photographing & empowering 100 bad ass babesDonating $5000 to FGWRCImproving & expanding the iammorethanjustabody.com website & empowered education siteTravel to: Las Vegas, Regina, Montreal, Chicago, Omaha, New York, San Fran, San Diego, Vancouver, and Texas.....Teach 3-5 workshops alongside Lindsay Rae PhotographyFinish my bookFind balance between work & my health by delegating to my amazing teamLive fearlessly and try everything that I want to....stop talking about it and actually DO IT.Public speak at at least 2 gigs
I am sure as the year goes on I will add to this list, but my biggest wish for 2017 is that I empower women who will go on to empower women and help create a global movement of bad ass babes who want to focus on their goals and dreams instead of spending their energy on hating themselves. I would love to hear what your dreams, ideas, and plans for the New Year! If you want to share, tag me in your FB posts or instagram posts!! In the meantime, I wish all of you bad ass babes a happy New Years day and I cannot stress how amazed I am at the fearlessness demonstrated by every gorgeous woman that stripped down both physically and emotionally for me during 2016. I can't wait to meet new babes in 2017 and see past babes as they top up their confidence cup with future shoots! Stay tuned for the next blog post outlining what you can look forward to from Teri Hofford Photography in 2017!!