I consider Miss S to be a good friend in addition to an awesome client. I mean, this babe will literally go to the ends of the world for the people in her life...who doesn't want someone like that in their life?? Well, we were supposed to do maternity photos for her, but if you remember the time I had someone go into labor while they were in hair and makeup, then you will be happy to know it was Miss S and the baby that arrived about 4 hours after we sent her to the hospital is Mr. T (above). Miss S came to my studio to paint my wall for me (because my attention to detail is shit and she showed up with her own professional brush!) so in exchange she was the first babe photographed on the wall and since she was a new mom, we also had Mr. T join us for the occasion. I literally never have babies in my studio during a session, but this was a bit different because we wanted to document something different.This is the season of her life now. Just when we would get into a sexy pose, Mr. would cry for his momma (he was hungry) and while we tried to continue, it was easier to stop and feed him, but during this time we also got some of my favorite photos of forever. For Miss S's shoot, this time around (she had done a shoot with me the year prior when I was in Vegas), I wanted her acknowledge her mom bod and really see it for what it was so I only lightly edited the images. I wanted to showcase her swelling breasts which provide sustenance to her baby, I wanted to show her the amazingness that is the body's ability to inflate and deflate, growing life while doing so. I wanted to show her that motherhood doesn't mean a lack of sexiness, it means a change in mind as to what sexy is. I wanted her to see that her body, while different, is a wonderful thing that is capable of so, so much (including climbing a 10ft ladder without falling off!!). Lastly, I wanted her to see that this is a new season of her life and her body is being used in a different fashion that it was before. Right now, it may seem like it's no longer hers, but the purpose of providing life and sustenance to her little dude seems to be a pretty important task...to add the task of fitting into "societal beauty standards" and the "yummy mummy bod" would be rude. She is beautiful, gorgeous, and changed from the experience of having a child. Miss S wrote her own experiences in her blog here , explaining that she finally feels "at home" in her body!! I highly recommend checking it out!
Her body is not ruined, it has evolved.Her body is not ruined, it is a map of the terrain her body weathered while growing a life, giving birth, and continuing to feed. The blue rivers stretch to feed her baby, the shallow valleys of her skin tell the story of her body's journey, and mountain ridges of scar tissue while red now, will eventually erode, falling into the tapestry of her life's story.Her body is not ruined.
{This was the moment when Mr T decided to poo all over his momma's arm.}
Your body's job is to literally keep you alive, allowing you to move throughout the world in whatever manner you choose. It's not meant to be flawless, it's not meant to stay in the same form it was when you were in your "prime" (whatever the fuck that means), you are not entitled to a body of societal beauty standards...because that is not your body's job.
Imagine yourself at work. Wherever that is for you: it could be at an office, playing with kids, on a construction site, taking care of the elderly, or being creative, whatever. Now, let's assume that you are amazing at the tasks laid out for you by said profession. You show up when you are asked, you diligently perform the tasks no matter how much crap your boss throws your way, you try to go above and beyond in every possible form for your job. Now, imagine while you are doing such an amazing and consistent job when your boss comes up to you every day and says "You are ugly. Why can't you look prettier? Why aren't you stronger? You are gross and jiggly. You are disgusting. I wish you would go away. I wish you were someone else."
I can imagine you wouldn't appreciate it. I mean, on top of all the other stuff you are doing your best at, now you have to look a certain way and you are constantly being critiqued every day?? That would suck immensely and, I would hope, many of us would quit.
Your body does not need to be reminded that it's not good enough, when in fact it must be good enough if you are reading this. I am not saying you have to be in love with your body, but you certainly have to be appreciative of the fact that it is literally the only reason you are alive in this very instant. Despite the constant hate, anger, frustration, pinching, poking, squeezing, lifting, sighing, and verbal & physical abuse, your body shows up every day to do it's job to the best of it's ability.
We talk a lot about telling yourself that your body is beautiful. But it doesn't have to be in order for it to be valuable. Why do we have to associate our appreciation for our body immediately with beauty? Maybe we need to take a step back and really think about why we have to deduce everything about ourselves to being "beautiful" as if once we recognize our beauty THEN we become valuable. Maybe we never recognize that we are "beautiful", does this make us less valuable?? Fuck no. We have to realize that ourSELVES can be so much more than just "beautiful".
So, stop expecting your body to fall into a societal standard of beauty that changes every 10 years, because that is not it's fucking job.Your body deserves a break from the verbal and physical abuseYour body deserves recognition of it's talents and abilities at keeping you alive